


reunion

by thisissirius



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-20
Updated: 2017-01-20
Packaged: 2018-09-18 20:26:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9401684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisissirius/pseuds/thisissirius
Summary: “I’m scared,” Aaron admits, quietly.





	

**Author's Note:**

> written as a follow up to yesterday. 
> 
> wanted to see the aftermath of their reunion, of them sleeping in the same bed and this is what i have.

Robert keeps his distance.

He lets Chas and Liv both welcome Aaron home in their way, retreating to the pub. It’s hard; he wants to be with Aaron, wants to touch him and tell him everything’s going to be okay. He’s been worried all day, a low thrum under his skin that he can’t shake. 

It’s not what Aaron needs right now; Aaron needs everyone, need to realise he’s not alone and that he has people who are willing to stand by him. 

Not - not Robert, who was willing to throw everything way not twenty hours before. He grinds the heel of his palms into his eyes and grits his teeth against the urge to scream. 

“Two pints please, Charity.”

Robert looks up, sees Pete and Finn at the end of the bar and his anger blossoms into something all-consuming and ugly. He pushes back on his seat, eyes flashing dangerously. 

“Rob,” Charity says, her eyes knowing. “Go out back and find our Aaron, yeah?”

“Why?” Robert says immediately, eyes flicking back to Finn, who’s deliberately not looking in his direction. 

Charity leans across the bar, face not inches from Robert’s. “If you deck Finn in ‘ere, how’s that gonna help Aaron?”

_It won’t,_ Robert thinks, and shakes himself out of his anger. It’s still there, waiting, biding its time, but that’s something he’s got plenty of. He gives Finn a smile and stands, downing the rest of his beer. “Thanks.”

Charity waves him off and goes to fill Pete’s order.   
  
  
Rob doesn’t particularly want to go out back, his talk with Aaron skating past the many things they have to talk about. Robert wants them to spill out, for them to  _fix_ , but he knows it’s not that easy, that this is something they’re going to have to work on. 

Voices are drifting through the open back door; Liv - “- gonna be okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” Aaron lies, and Robert leans against wall. He shouldn’t eavesdrop, should announce his presence and get whatever reception is waiting, but he can’t make his feet move, can’t disrupt whatever moment they’re having. 

“Aaron-”

“I’m  _fine_ ,” Aaron stresses, even though nobody within eavesdropping distance believes him. “I promise. You can go to bed.”

“Are you sure, love?” Chas presses, and god, Robert loves her. Aaron needs her more than he’s ever great at admitting, and Robert’s grateful. They don’t see eye to eye all the time, but Robert doesn’t think he can do this with Aaron, get  _through_  this with Aaron if Chas isn’t there. 

“Yes, mum,” Aaron says, softer, and Robert can picture the look on his face. “Rob’ll be back soon.”

Robert starts, unsure whether or not that’s something Aaron really wants. 

“Okay.” Chas is unquestioning, and Robert feels unworthy, for that split second, of the amount of faith she has that he can be what Aaron needs. 

_I hate who I am with you_

“Come on, Lady,” Chas says, and Robert assumes she’s dragging Liv along. Liv, who gives Aaron a parting shot. 

“Rob’ll take care of ya.”

Robert closes his eyes. He hears a door close, and the sound of Aaron moving around the kitchen. He wants to breeze in, find the confidence he had not an hour ago when Aaron first came home. He pushes open the door.

“Wondered when you were gonna come in,” Aaron says. He’s sitting at the kitchen table, a mug of tea between his hands, another resting on the table where Robert usually sits. It’s his favourite mug, and he rolls his eyes. 

“How did you know?”

Aaron just stares at him, eyebrows raised. 

Robert shrugs off his jacket and hangs it on the back of the chair. He doesn’t sit down, skin itching, rocking back on his heels. “I can stay at Vic’s tonight, if-”

“No,” Aaron says quickly, then shrinks back on himself, eyes on his mug. He’s got his sweater pulled over his hands, ends of his fingers poking out, and Robert’s heart skips. It’s a comforting gesture and he wants to  _touch_ , wants to hug Aaron. 

Robert doesn’t know what to do here, what to  _say_. 

The silence between them drags, awkward and stilted, and eventually Robert sits, just for something to do. 

“I’m scared,” Aaron admits, quietly.

Robert’s heart clenches. He’s supposed to protect Aaron, to make sure he’s happy. Isn’t this why all this started? Because he can’t make Aaron happy? He didn’t know then, certainly doesn’t know now. Robert gets angry, takes it out in words and ridiculous drama. 

“Aaron,” Robert’s fingers itch to touch Aaron’s. He settles for resting his hand on the table between them, palm up. Letting Aaron decide. “I’m not leaving.”

Aaron looks him in the eye, Robert can see the uncertainty written all over his face. “You can’t promise that.”

“Can, actually,” Robert tells him, snorting. He sobers quickly, eyes never once leaving Aaron’s face. “I’ll be here. I’m not going to un-choose you or leave just because of this.”

“ _This_  isn’t something I can throw off quickly, Rob. It’s-”

“You think I don’t know that?” Robert snaps, not meaning to get angry, but he can’t shake it, can’t make it  _leave_. “It’s running through my head every second, Aaron, the thought of losing you, of you having to go to prison. It scares me, too.”

Robert drags the admission up from somewhere deep, throws it between them like a gauntlet. 

“I don’t want that for you, but I’ll be here. Whatever you need, okay? Even if -” Robert’s mouth twists on the word. “Even if you decide to not do this.”

He waves his free hand between them, hoping Aaron understands. 

_Even if you don’t want me_.

Aaron’s mouth opens, closes. He reaches out, fingers tightening around Robert’s hand. “You can’t unpropose.”

Robert’s eyes close, emotions rolling over him. (He  _has_ unproposed, the sound of the ring settling on the table, the look on Aaron’s face after  _I mean I literally can’t._ ) “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Aaron’s voice sounds raw, and when Robert looks up, he’s crying, rubbing at his eyes with his sweater. 

Robert clings to Aaron’s hand, rubs his thumb over Aaron’s bruised and battered knuckles. It’s an ugly reminder of why they’re here, why this is happening, but Robert shoves it down, focuses on Aaron. “What do you want?”

Aaron gives him a soft, weak approximation of a smile. “Go to bed. With you.”

“I missed you last night,” Robert admits, looking at a point over Aaron’s shoulder. He wants to get better at this, admissions shouldn’t be difficult, not to Aaron. “Bed’s cold.”

Aaron doesn’t say anything; Robert knows he’s thinking of the prison cell and kicks himself. He tugs on Aaron’s hand. 

“Come on,” he says. “You call the shots.”

The look on Aaron’s face is hard to decipher; equal parts disbelief, uncertainty and pure unadulterated love. Robert feels uncomfortable, pulls away from Aaron and grabs his mug to place it in the sink. It’s on his way back to the table that Aaron catches him, one hand on his hip, spinning him around. 

“Hey,” Aaron says softly, pulling Robert in until their hips are flush. “I love ya.”

“I love you too,” Robert says, effortless. He rests a hand on the back of Aaron’s neck, rubbing the skin there. There are so many things Robert wants to say;  _I’ll protect you, I’m sorry, I wish I could-_

Aaron leans in, kisses Robert softly. “Upstairs.”

It’s softer, no heat to it, and Robert craves it more than he’s ever craved sex with Aaron. 

 

The bed is still unmade from that morning, Robert barely managing to crawl out of it, tired and worried. Aaron makes a face, but doesn’t complain as they both undress and climb under the covers. 

They lie on their backs, apart, and for a beat Robert thinks they’ll sleep that way. It’s not ideal, he’s been all too aware of Aaron’s absence and he doesn’t  _want_  that here, in their bed, ever again. Thankfully Aaron rolls onto his side, drags a hand to Robert’s t-shirt and tugs until Robert slides over. Throwing a thigh over Robert’s legs, Aaron buries his face in Robert’s collarbone, takes a deep breath. He’s shaking, Robert realises, and wraps him up, finds a position they’re both comfortable with. 

“It’s okay,” Robert says, even if it’s not, it can’t be. “I’m here.”

Aaron lets out a shuddering breath, fists his hand in Robert’s t-shirt. “I can’t do it, Rob. I can’t.”

Robert’s heart aches, his whole body thrums with the need to protect, to  _help_ , but he can’t. What use is he, right now? 

“We’ll figure something out,” Robert tells him, eventually. “Whatever happens, Aaron, okay? I’ll be here no matter what, you have to know that.”

It takes an age, minutes ticking by slow and unsteady, but then Aaron lets out a slow, shaky breath. “Yeah, yeah okay.”

Robert doesn’t know if it’s true, thinks maybe not, but at least Aaron’s listening, and he’ll keep saying it until his voice goes hoarse if it will help.

“I missed ya,” Aaron says, soft and low.  
  
Robert’s eyes burn with tears and he tilts his head, brushes lips to Aaron’s temple, pulls Aaron in closer. Aaron’s grip is tight, fierce, and Robert buries his nose in Aaron’s hair,   
closes his eyes.   
  
He’s scared, body aching with the knowledge that there’s still prison in Aaron’s future, that he’ll lose Aaron again and won’t know how to deal with that crushing loneliness, the fear of losing Aaron completely.   
  
“I missed you too,” Robert says, as much to himself as to Aaron. “And I promise ya I’m not leaving.”   
  
He won’t leave, he  _won’t_.   
  
(Aaron’s too important, the  _most_  important.)


End file.
